New Moon Devotion #1: What Can Separate Us?


I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure I was dreaming.

The reasons I was so certain were that, first, I was standing in a bright shaft of sunlight—the kind of blinding clear sun that never shone on my drizzly new home-town of Forks, Washington—and second, I was looking at my Grandma Marie. Gran had been dead for six years now, so that was solid evidence toward the dream theory.

“Bella?”
It wasn’t Gran who called my name, and we both turned to see the addition to our small reunion. I didn’t have to look to know who it was; this was a voice I would know anywhere—know, and respond to, whether I was awake or asleep…or even dead, I’d bet. …
Edward. …Here he was, strolling gracefully toward me—with the most beautiful smile on his angel’s face—as if I were the only one here.
Edward—still smiling so beautifully that my heart felt like it was going to swell up and burst through my chest—put his arm around my shoulder and turned to face my grandmother.
Gran’s expression surprised me….she was staring at me sheepishly, as if waiting for a scolding. And she was standing in such a strange position—one arm held awkwardly away from her body, stretched out and then curled around the air. Like she had her arm around someone I couldn’t see, someone invisible…
Only then, as I looked at the bigger picture, did I notice the huge gilt frame that enclosed my grandmother’s form. …I raised the hand that wasn’t wrapped around Edward’s waist and reached out to touch her. She mimicked the movement exactly, mirrored it. But where our fingers should have met, there was nothing but cold glass…
With a dizzying jolt, my dream abruptly became a nightmare.
There was no Gran.
That was me. Me in a mirror. Me—ancient, creased, and withered.
Edward stood beside me, casting no reflection, excruciatingly lovely and forever seventeen.
He pressed his icy, perfect lips against my wasted cheek.
“Happy birthday,” he whispered.
New Moon – Chapter 1

That would be really scary. If I were aging and my husband was staying the same age, I would consider that horrifying, too! Getting old isn’t so bad, when you have someone getting old with you. But Bella is facing the possibility of aging by herself. How can you feel as if you belong with someone, if every day you feel less and less the same? Less and less in tune?

It’s not possible.

More than that, what Bella fears is her mortality actually keeping her from Edward’s love, of losing him to time itself. Worse than simply aging and becoming less in sync with an ever-ageless love, she also faces a mortal end to her life, and leaving Edward to face eternity alone.
That’s really a lot to deal with.

Is it really possible that God loves us the same when we’re at our most beautiful and when we’re withered and wasted? Do we fear a day when He’ll just look at us and say, “I’m sorry, I just can’t stay with you any longer”? He already promised that nothing can separate us from His love, ever.

Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture:
They kill us in cold blood because they hate you.
We’re sitting ducks; they pick us off one by one.
None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us
(Romans 8:37-39, The Message).

But wanting desperately to avoid end-of-life questions like wills, death panels, and power-of-attorney, I’m going to limit the topic to one aspect only: losing Edward’s love.
It’s not exactly the same as what we face with God, as the end of our days actually brings us closer to being one with Him forever, but symbolically, we can look at aging as a symbol for life, circumstances, and time itself.
How secure are we in God’s love? Do we look at ourselves in the mirror and question whether or not we’ll always be lovable to Him? What if we looked at Gran’s wrinkled and withered face as a symbol for how we may look to God now?

Another version says, “nor even things which are to come,” which, to me includes any  unforeseen circumstances. He’s in it for the haul.

Much like Bella and Edward’s discussion on the subject, later in the series, when Edward says “Bella, I’ll always love you, I’ll always want you, no matter what.” Bella says “What about when I look like a grandmother?” Edward’s response is just classic, conveying that it didn’t matter to him what anyone else thought, she would still be the love of his life (er, existence?), even when/if she did age.

This is a promise of undying, unconditional love; of absolute security. Can we receive it, or will we choose to walk in fear of the future?

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~ by sarahthebaker on December 27, 2009.

3 Responses to “New Moon Devotion #1: What Can Separate Us?”

  1. I’ll receive it. 🙂 Great post, Sarah! Write on!

  2. I love that you have taken a book that so many young girls are connected to and made it something spiritually strengthening. Thanks for your hard work, keep it up! God bless you!

    • Thanks so much Liz! It’s my prayer that what I do will make people think about God in a new way. 🙂 I appreciate your kindness!

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